I Am Wiccan!
How I Found My Light...
I am a proud Wiccan and have practiced it since Spring of 2003. I am new, to
say the least, but I am opened to the religion and doing my best in it. I am not a member of a Coven, mainly
because there is only one available in my area, that I know of. And judging from the website, I may not agree
with everything they teach there. So I choose the path, as so many do today, of Solitary Wiccan.
With the help of Solitary guides (books) and internet connection (forums,
chatrooms, and email), I am able to practice Wicca in the comfort of my own home. If I have
questions, I can always refer to the books or email an friend. (^_^)Little known fact to many of my internet friends, is that I was born and
raised under the religion of Christain. From ages 6 - 12 I attended Sunday Bible School. By ages 13 - 17, I began
studying the Bible with my parents and church ministers. By age 18, I made the decision to become a Christian
Minister and attended a formal Bible College. By age 19, I was newly a minister and looking for a church to serve in.
But more and more, I felt as if I didn't fit in this religion, little by little.
There were a lot of questions left unanswered and I found that I didn't agree with many of the
views. But I stuck it out, always feeling as through I was stuffing my feet in shoes that were two sizes too small.
Then, one day, I had completely lost my faith in my religion. I woke up one morning and just threw all of my awards
and certifications from Bible College into a closet. And I felt free... but also very scared! With no religion now,
what was I going to do? (o_o) I spent six months, in bitterness and deep depression. And then while playing an internet
online game, one of the players mention she was Wiccan.
At first, I didn't know what that meant, so I asked, "Does that mean witch?" The woman answered,
"Yes, that's another way of saying it..." I know now why she didn't want to be labled that (see: About Paganism),
but back then, I was clueless. (;^_^) At that time, there was a few people who hurt me very badly and I was thinking she could do
curses for me, if I promised to trade game items with her. But before I could add on about the trade for items, she
cut me off. "No," she said, "It's against my religion to do harm to others."
BUT, you're a witch!, my mind was screaming, What kind of witch are you? It was a good thing
I didn't say this out-loud to her! I was raised in great ignorance, always taught that "witches" sat around all day and did
bad spells on people. And if they didn't do so, they were no longer witches. So, I kinda said, "Thanks, anyway." and moved on.
I figured the woman was being selfish or lazy, not wanting to cast a curse for me. Then in the course of two weeks, I met two
more Wiccans at seperate occasions and ask them to do a curse for me.
They each declined and I was starting to think that witches were just plain mean and selfish, only doing
curses for themselves and other witches! Then I later found a site advertising curses for sell, claiming to be owned by
"Wiccans". But... at that time, I didn't have any money and these spells weren't cheap! Good thing, because if they were cheap,
I might have done something REALLY stupid! Thank The Gods! (^o^)
That's when I met a girl named "Summer" in the game. She was always happy and cheerful, her spirit drew
you in and it's was a blast hanging out with her. She was very popular in the game, because of her smiling way of looking at
things. We became best buds and for a whole month I logged onto the game, just to joke around with her and the rest of group
there. One day, she casually mentioned she was Pagan. I had asked once again, "Does that mean, witch?" She said, "No, and they
prefer to be called Wiccans. I am Neo-Pagan." I then asked her what that meant. She explained what her religion was all about
and after she had logged off, I "Google-d" Neo-Pagan, to learn more.
After learning more, I also looked up Wiccan. Then it dawned on me... my beliefs about Paganism was all
WRONG! The three Wiccans who turned me down, for a free curse, didn't do it because they were mean and selfish... They did it
because they simply don't believe in causing anyone harm. Even if a person deserve it, Wiccans believe that it's not their
place to give punishment. Only The Goddess and The God may do that. And punishment comes in the form of Karma. If you do something
wrong, you gain "Bad Karma" and what you've done wrong will come back on you, times three. And if you do something good, you
gain "Good Karma" and also that will come back on you times three. (^_^)
Reading that, I became very interested in finding out more. I had joined a Wiccan forum and began asking a lot
of questions. They were very helpful, answering them all, never vague and easy to understand. And then one night, I realized that
I might want to take my new-found knowledge a step futher... I wanted to become a Wiccan too. So, I asked my new friends at this
forum where and how do I join this religion. They told me that I must read first... and ALOT. They told me about Amazon.com and the
titles of books to get.
My first book was Wicca: A Guide For The Solitary Practitioner. Then soon
others followed and many more websites/forums followed. After two years of studying and researching, I decided I was ready! And I
have been praticing ever since. (^o^)
Well, my online gaming group was made up of seven people, including myself. And sadly, due to half of the group
getting into arguments with the other half (not about religion, just silly things), things were said and done cruely. Summer, a few
others, and I moved to another part of the game's server and tried to hang there... but things weren't the same. Before I knew it,
I had let my account lapse and I never saw Summer again. I never got to tell her "thanks" for opening the door to this beautiful
religion. Maybe someday...